I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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