He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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