She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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