and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I love having hate sex.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
