thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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