So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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