Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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