I think i sorta joined a cult last night
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
