absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
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