So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
