i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
