i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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