After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
this beer tastes like vomit already
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Randomize
