What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
