He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize