just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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