The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
