dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
