Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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