Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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