me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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