oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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