Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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