I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
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