you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
