Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
