i may or may not be watching the land before time
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
