I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Drunk is not a location!
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
