I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
PANTIES FOUND
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