This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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