Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
