i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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