Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Randomize