kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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