ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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