I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize