just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
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