Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
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Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
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Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.