there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
