Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.

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  (303): You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher? (720): Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced. http://tfl.nu/qahj
  Replies (35) Good night (12863) Bad night (1403)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many

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  (319): You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many http://tfl.nu/z652
  Replies (8) Good night (4942) Bad night (1144)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"

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  (604): You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band" http://tfl.nu/p9bm
  Replies (10) Good night (3634) Bad night (1180)
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  (830): View more from Texas

  Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.

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  (830): Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/q7ix
  Replies (10) Good night (4532) Bad night (1075)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think

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  (763): using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think http://tfl.nu/9ucc
  Replies (3) Good night (2652) Bad night (1014)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk

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  (781): just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk http://tfl.nu/vmmw
  Replies (14) Good night (3032) Bad night (2083)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.

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  (408): I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night. http://tfl.nu/u07w
  Replies (7) Good night (1460) Bad night (686)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth

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  (607): Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth http://tfl.nu/3kds
  Replies (8) Good night (1536) Bad night (672)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.

  (1-954): View more from Florida

  Marco

  (954): View more from Florida

  Polo

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  (954): These days, you and me are swimming in dicks. (1-954): Marco (954): Polo http://tfl.nu/zk92
  Replies (6) Good night (2646) Bad night (612)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.

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  (412): I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden. http://tfl.nu/eagc
  Replies (2) Good night (777) Bad night (398)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating

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  (216): I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating http://tfl.nu/1tih
  Replies (3) Good night (1144) Bad night (354)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.

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  (908): Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother. http://tfl.nu/ysht
  Replies (1) Good night (734) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.

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  (919): Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home. http://tfl.nu/lft8
  Replies (2) Good night (693) Bad night (273)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation

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  (513): 5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation http://tfl.nu/t8h7
  Replies (1) Good night (767) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.

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  (561): Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin. http://tfl.nu/zfxh
  Replies (2) Good night (568) Bad night (225)

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