sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
