Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
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I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
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Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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