and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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