dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
We had sex on a dog bed..
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.