The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
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he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
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you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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