it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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