Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Do vagina's smell?
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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