you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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