Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
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