yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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