Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
